Laurianne's Hope

Thursday, March 16, 2006

I Have This Cough....

I have this cough. I would judge that it was about the end of January that it started, or at least that I started to notice it. Because I remember telling my mom that I had it but it went away at when I visited them in February. And it came back. I thought, well, all the construction at work. It is just a little cough. Then I coughed one night and started worrying about lung cancer. I got up to look at the signs. "Wasn't a cough one of them?" And I found persistant cough and though, "Well, it hasn't been persistant. It comes and goes." Then I kicked Julius off my pillow and thought, "I bet that pet dander is what is doing it." Then I said to myself that if I should be concerned about this, maybe I will get a sign.

The next morning, I was overcome with grief because Dana Reeves died. I told my mom about my cough and staying up all night worrying about lung cancer. She told me to keep an eye on it. I didn't want to worry her, because it is just a cough, right. I mean, I feel great!

Lately, I have been plagued with weird dreams. Monday, it was a dream where I was Buffy the Vampire Slayer fighting off vampires. One of them sunk his teeth into my neck and the voice in my head screamed "I want to live!!" Dan woke me up before I could defeat him, but it wasn't a nightmare. I was confident I would beat the vampire. (I wasn't going to share that dream, because it was really weird and I haven't seen Buffy for months now! Plus, for some reason, I really don't like to admit I enjoy the show.) For hours afterwards, I kept hearing that voice say, "I want to live!!!"

Tuesday, Wednesday and last night, I have been plagued with more weird dreams. Images that linger but as reality sets in they slowly fade away. I told Dan this morning that I need to call the doctor about that cough. He said, "OK".

I just called them. I have an appointment next Thursday. I feel like if I didn't get it checked out, I would be a hypocrite. If you have a cough, see your doctor. I have been wanting a lung cancer screening for preventative reasons and have been questioning myself if I should ask him. I am only 32 years old. But my sister was younger than me. My lips have never touched a cigarette. Well, Laurianne may have experimented as a teenager, but she was a non-smoker. Still, it isn't something I should really worry about right? But part of me knows that I won't have piece of mind until I see my doctor. Lung cancer is already a pretty rare thing for non-smokers. But still, after my sister, lung cancer is constantly on my mind.

And I have this cough.

**Update: My cough turned out possibly be from some irratant in the air. This is what I suspected but even my doctor agreed that it never hurts to get it checked out. If it doesn't go away in a month, I am suppose to go back to see him.**

Lung Cancer AwarenessPosted by Lynda (Laurianne's Sister) :: 10:11 AM :: 0 people are more aware