Monday, May 22, 2006

7 Months

Today marks the 7 month anniversary of Laurianne's death. My dad is traveling so he asked me to write something today.

I haven't really been focusing on the actual days. I know it is different for my parents. My dad says Saturdays will never be the same for him. For me, my grief can be triggered by even a small event - like seeing a memorial on TV, even a ficitional one. We are each dealing with it in a different way. Sometimes I reflect on what could have been, but it is important to move forward. For Calem, and for ourselves.

In honor of Laurianne, I am posting some symptoms of lung cancer people don't know about. If you have any concerns, it is important to see your doctor. If you are a non-smoker, it is also important to remember that you may need to demand lung cancer screening, due to the stigma of lung cancer being a smoking disease.

1. Shoulder or upper back pain: Pain in the shoulder or upper back is a symptom of lung cancer. The pain results from a tumor pressing on the lining of the lungs.
   
2. Swelling of the face and neck is also a symptom of lung cancer: Tumors can often put pressure of blood vessels, not allowing fluids to to travel as efficiently throughout the body. The fluids then build up, causing swelling of the face and neck.
   
3. Frequently having pneumonia or other lung infections: Tumor cells can trap bacteria causing frequent lung infections. Frequently getting pneumonia is also a symptom of lung cancer.
   
4. Male breast development: Gynecomastia is the overdevelopment of the male breast and can be a symptom of lung cancer in men. Breast growth in men is normally due to the increase of estrogen. Lung cancer has been known to produce estrogen.
   
5. Hoarseness: Do you constantly feel like you have to clear your throat or your throat feels hoarse. This is a very common symptom of lung cancer. Lung cancer tumor cells can block passageways leading to many symtpoms, like hoarseness.
   
   More About Lung Cancer: If you are experiencing the symptoms of lung cancer, please see your doctor. Keep in mind that these symptoms of lung cancer are also the symptoms of many other benign condition.

Lastly, I know my dad would ask you to light a candle today. I have a special candle just for Laurianne that I will light tonight. Remember those who have departed, and remember tell someone who you care about that you love them. You never know what the future has in store for you.

I measure every grief...

I measure every grief I meet
With analytic eyes;
I wonder if it weighs like mine,
Or has an easier size.

I wonder if they bore it long,
Or did it just begin?
I could not tell the date of mine,
It feels so old a pain.

I wonder if it hurts to live,
And if they have to try,
And whether, could they choose between,
They would not rather die.

I wonder if when years have piled--
Some thousands--on the cause
Of early hurt, if such a lapse
Could give them any pause;

Or would they go on aching still
Through centuries above,
Enlightened to a larger pain
By contrast with the love.

The grieved are many, I am told;
The reason deeper lies,--
Death is but one and comes but once
And only nails the eyes.

There's grief of want, and grief of cold,--
A sort they call 'despair,'
There's banishment from native eyes,
In sight of native air.

And though I may not guess the kind
Correctly yet to me
A piercing comfort it affords
In passing Calvary,

To note the fashions of the cross
Of those that stand alone
Still fascinated to presume
That some are like my own.


Emily Dickinson

Posted by Lynda (Laurianne's Sister) :: 5:51 AM :: 1 people are more aware ---------------------------------------